Bed Bug Apocolypse

The bed bug epidemic has reached epidemic proportions. The jury is still out, however, as to whether the world is ending because it is being overrun with bed bugs, or if humans will end the world in order to get rid of them.

This is the story so far:

• Bed bugs used to be a problem.


• Then we began covering the world in nasty toxic chemicals like DDT, and bed bugs were not a problem.


• But we were killing all other living creatures on the planet along with the bedbugs, so we stopped with the DDT.


• Then, 50 years or so later, all the bedbugs started coming back.


• The government basically advises barricading yourself in your home, avoiding contact with other humans, and sleeping in a bug zapper.


• If you find bedbugs in your home, you should abandon your home and all your possessions (which most of us are doing anyway because of the economic crisis), remove all your clothing, and move into a hermetically sealed bubble.

Unfortunately, according to media reports, people with bed bug infestations are starting to douse their houses with toxic chemicals or kerosene. Not a good idea.

In Cincinnati, an unlicensed applicator saturated an apartment complex in June with an agricultural pesticide typically used on golf courses. Seven tenants got sick and were treated at the hospital. The property was quarantined, and all tenants were forced to move. Authorities are pursuing criminal charges.

...

Authorities around the country have blamed house fires on people misusing all sorts of highly flammable garden and lawn chemicals to fight bedbugs. Experts also warn that some hardware products - bug bombs, cedar oil and other natural oils - claim to be lethal but merely cause the bugs to scatter out of sight and hide in cracks in walls and floors.

Superbugs will kill you in the hospital

Just when you thought the only kind of super bug that hospitals were trying to kill you with was Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA), it turns out that they are adding a new one to the mix: Clostridium difficile, or C. diff as we say in the 'hood.

The Washington Post reports that C. diff is sickening about 3 million people a year, usually after they visit a hospital or clinic.

According to the article:

It can cause severe diarrhea and inflammation of the colon. It is deadly in up to one in 40 cases, particularly when it strikes the elderly and infirm, and contributes to 15,000 to 30,000 deaths annually, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Recent studies have shown a 25% higher incidence of C. diff than the better-known and more publicity savvy MRSA in 28 community hospitals tested by people in White Coats.

Once again, the main culprits appear to be over-prescription of antibiotics, and hospital staff not washing their hands:

According to the American Academy of Family Physicians, the C. diff germ has been cultured from bed rails, floors, toilets and windowsills, and it can remain in hospital rooms for up to 40 days after infected patients have been discharged. Health-care workers can hasten the spread. One study found C. diff on the hands of almost 60 percent of doctors and nurses caring for infected patients - a percentage experts said could be reduced dramatically if they washed their hands thoroughly with soap and water between patients.

Acetaminophin could give your kid asthma

According to the latest reports by people in White Coats, new studies suggest a correlation between kids who take acetaminophen (aka Tylenol) and kids who develop asthma.

According to a pair of reports in the American Journal of Respiratory and Critical Care Medicine (slogan "Home of breath-taking research!"), there seems to be growing evidence that giving kids acetaminophen can increase the odds that a kid will develop asthma or other breathing trouble.

In one study, researchers followed 1,000 Ethiopian tots for three years.:

When the toddlers turned one, the researchers asked the mothers if their babies had breathing problems, and how much acetaminophen they had used.

About eight percent of the kids began to wheeze between ages one and three. Those who had been given acetaminophen during their first year -- before they had breathing trouble -- had up to seven times the odds of developing wheezing.

That increase held even after adjusting for fever and coughs, which in principle could have triggered both the wheezing and the use of painkillers.

Another study following 320,000 teens in 50 countries found that kids who took acetaminophin at least once a month doubled their odds of developing asthma, and seems to be associated with other breathing problems.

However, researchers helpfully point out that there may not be any good alternatives if your kid is in suffering. Ibuprofen (aka Advil), is not recommended if your kid already has asthma (although there nothing to suggest that it might do harm if your kid doesn't have asthma already), and aspirin is generally frowned upon.

Two popular alternative treatments include telling the kid "I'll give you something to cry about" and Worried Dad's brother's favorite method of pinching them really hard somewhere other than where they are currently feeling pain.

Bad eggs! Very bad eggs!

Chickens appear to have begun a massive uprising by infecting our nation's eggs with salmonella.

According to authorities, the rebel chickens are using two farms in Iowa that are the source for gazillions of infected eggs sent to stores in at least 59 states. The hens have funneled the tainted eggs through 87,000 front businesses that pretend to be from local farms.

Anyone finding eggs in their house should immediately call authorities and stomp the eggs on their kitchen floors before eating.

According to the rebel chicken leader, the felonious fowl demands include: The right to be shaken, but not baked, and the ability to cross the road without being interrogated.

Going to the gym will kill you

[The people in the above photo were found dead moments after this picture were taken]

My two main reasons for canceling my gym membership were that I was broke and I got tired of being a straight guy surrounded by naked men in the locker room. Plus, I'm lazy.

Thankfully, people in White Coats (working for people in running shorts) have given me a better reason: gyms are covered in nasty germs.

As the staid "Gray Lady" herself, the New York Times, soberly put it:

When you go to the gym, do you wash your hands before and after using the equipment? Bring your own regularly cleaned mat for floor exercises? Shower with antibacterial soap and put on clean clothes immediately after your workout? Use only your own towels, razors, bar soap, water bottles?

If you answered "no" to any of the above, you could wind up with one of the many skin infections that can spread like wildfire in athletic settings.

Well, sure, you say, that's why they call it athlete's foot, after all. What's the big deal? Well, that's what some guy you've never heard of thought, pal:

And if you think skin problems are minor, consider what happened to Kyle Frey, a 21-year-old junior and competitive wrestler at Drexel University in Philadelphia.

Mr. Frey noticed a pimple on his arm last winter but thought little of it. He competed in a match on a Saturday, but by the next morning the pimple had grown to the size of his biceps and had become very painful.

His athletic trainer sent him straight to the emergency room, where the lesion was lanced and cultured. Two days later, he learned he had MRSA, the potentially deadly staphylococcus infection that is resistant to most antibiotics.

Mr. Frey spent five days in the hospital, where the lesion was surgically cleaned and stitched and treated with antibiotics that cleared the infection. He said in an interview that he does not know how he acquired MRSA: "The wrestling mat might have been contaminated, or I wrestled with someone who had the infection."

If it could happen to Mr. Frey, who said he has always been health-conscious in the gym and careful about not sharing his belongings, it could happen to you.

According to the CDC, if you insist on going to the gym, you are advised to wear a full body protective suit, refrain from touching anything, and keep a bottle of alcohol-based disinfectant to spray at anyone who comes within ten feet of you.

B Vitamins won't prevent death

According to the latest reports from people in White Coats, taking vitamin B, vitamin B6, vitamin B12, or folic acid supplements won't prevent heart attacks, as previous research had suggested.

It's unclear whether getting vitamins through food still does any good (Worried Dad's daughter, Cinderella, believes that vitamins only come in ice cream), and even if they do, they don't even have as much vitamins as they used to.