Obesity Epidemic Strikes Kid-Friendly Burros

In Spanish, the word "burrito" means "little donkey". The town of Oatman, Arizona, is having a different kind of donkey problem. It seems that one of the key attractions in the old mining town is that a lot of donkeys freely roam the streets. And since every kid who walks by can't resist handing out carrots and other goodies, those asses are now getting very fat.

The Bureau of Land Management is stepping in with a campaign to stop the wonton (oops, wanton) feeding of the animals.

Beware of Sandals and Candles

Thinking about a romantic candlelit dinner or a walk on the beach in flip flops? According to the latest research, you might as well just drink a bottle of cyanide and shoot yourself in the head.

Okay, not quite, but here are two worrisome items on candles and flip flops.

Item Numero Uno:

According to people in white coats at South Carolina State University, candles release "harmful fumes linked to lung cancer and asthma."

According to a report from the BBC:

Lead researcher Amid Hamidi said people who frequently used candles, for instance to help them relax in the bath or provide the right ambiance for dinner, were most at risk.

He told the American Chemical Society in Washington: "An occasional paraffin candle and its emissions will not likely affect you.

"But lighting many paraffin candles every day for years or lighting them frequently in an unventilated bathroom around a tub, for example, may cause problems."

The danger seems to result from the fact that the candles don't reach a high enough temperature to burn off the toxins. To avoid dying from candle-induced cancer, researchers recommend "smoking, alcohol, obesity, unhealthy diets, inactivity and heavy sun exposure."

Item Numero Dos:

According to White Coaters from EMSL Analytical in New York City, walking around in flip flops is not only a big fashion faux pas, but will, in all likelihood, kill you faster than several candlelit dinners for two in an enclosed space. At least in NYC.

According to a stolid report from the New York Daily News, "Flip-flops are a magnet for dangerous, deadly bacteria!!!!"

Two reporters wore flip flops around New York, taking subways, buses, and going to Coney Island. They then handed the flip flops to the lab boys, who then put them in a big centrifuge.

"The results? Pretty heinous."

Researchers found thousands of bacteria on the footwear. Sure, they were mostly harmless, but, they note, some came from people's mouths. The researchers speculate that this was a result of the reporters walking where someone had spit on the sidewalk, but then again, we all know how weird New Yorkers are. (I'm just saying).

True, the labsters didn't find anything like Staph aureus, but, they write, they could have. If, you know, you had an open sore on your foot, and, like, you stepped in something gross, and, like, it entered your blood, it could, you know, KILL YOU DEAD!!!

Obviously, if you are going to walk around New York City, you must dispose of your footwear after every outing.

More Scary Things In Your Garden

Worried Dad's garden is doing very well, and if something is going well, then it's time to worry.

Item #1: Tomatoes and Potatoes are Getting Wiped Out

Tomato and potato crops throughout the Northeast US are getting decimated by Late Blight, a fungus that once caused the Irish Potato Famine.

Experts (or "Blightists") say that the fungus made its way to Northern gardens and fields through Big Box gardening centers. The unusually wet temperate weather created a perfect breeding ground for the fungus, which spread quickly as more people have turned to home gardens. Next year, start your tomatoes and potatoes from seed or get your starters from garden centers that buy from local farms.

Item #2: Don't Touch the Pretty Weeds

The next time you're about to tidy up the garden and pull up the weeds, you better be sure that you know the difference between Heracleum sphondylium (a nice ornamental plant known as Common Hogweed) and its evil twin Heracleum mantegazzianum (better known as Giant Hogweed). The latter has been spotted in backyards throughout the Northeast. Touching it "can cause skin sensitivity, burning blisters, and blackened scars if you are exposed to its toxic, watery sap."

Item #3: Plants Can Eat Meat

Intrepid botanists have discovered a hitherto unknown species of giant meat-eating plants in the central Philippines.

According to one of the botanical daredevils, "The plant is among the largest of all carnivorous plant species and produces spectacular traps as large as other species which catch not only insects, but also rodents as large as rats." Or, he might have added, small children.

While this plant was previously not a threat to human civilization, the botanists placed specimens in the herbarium of Palawan State University.